Results Selling by Caring, How Hard Can It Be?

Many times, when I discuss the issue of Caring About People with individuals or groups, many people think ‘what a basic fundamental’ and ‘how hard can it be?’

If you feel the same way, you couldn’t be more right. It is absolutely a simple process; however, very few people know how to accomplish it with sincerity, integrity and grace in their daily life. Caring About People is not just a life issue; it is a business issue. You have to make a serious decision to modify your daily behavior. What does this have to do with sales? you ask. The more you sincerely care about people the greater you ability to sell.

Question to Care

You have to become a highly sophisticated question asker in life to Care About People. People who think they know how to ask questions can always get better as people who think they are good listeners can always improve. The art of questioning is completely reliant on the art of listening.

Observation

The first lesson of Caring About People is based simply on observation. Here are some ways to up your sales process by observing the customer:

• Get a notebook to jot down observatory notes. You can utilize a personal computer to keep notes; however, you need to be in a position to jot down notes throughout the day when you observe the human behavior I am about to describe.
• Listen very closely to people and pay attention to their statements. You have to listen for tone of voice. Here is a simple example you can do with a friend, but I would recommend it with a client.
  • Call someone on the telephone and ask them very sincerely, “How is your day today?” Then,
  • Based on their level of comfort and ability to communicate, they most likely will respond with a fabricated ‘fine’ or ‘good.’ At first, listen for tone of voice. The word ‘fine’ can have a multitude of meanings. Someone can be completely fine and sincerely okay, or you may notice they are covering up something with this statement. It may take you several days to start listening close to tone of voice and word usage but keep trying.
  • Ask gut questions. Gut questions are those things you feel deep inside and would like to ask someone you maybe never had the guts to ask before.

In my business life, I have asked about almost anything you can imagine under the sun. I’ve asked questions on issues related to medical, children, difficult job tasks, favorite foods, budget, quotas, deadlines, fears, accomplishments, dissatisfactions, etc. You name it; I’ve asked it.

Benefit of Listening

The benefit of listening closely after a question is two fold; first, how a person reacts to various types of questions on different topics. You are not looking for a particular type of reaction; any reaction and response is what you need.

You will learn so much about people when you pay attention to them on a deep emotional level. This is not intended to be sappy; it is mere fact. The depths of relationships are founded in the depth of emotional understanding. This does not take away from your need to bring a proper solution to the table, or talk about benefits, or even ask for orders.

Do not misunderstand me when I speak of Caring About People. What I am saying is, by the time you learn more about CAP you will understand that your success highly depends on how well you relate to individuals on a personal level.

The second goal of listening to answers intently is to gauge the direction of other questions. Here is another example. You ask someone, “How is your day?” They respond, “Fine.” You notice the word “fine” has negative overtones in it. In listening you can’t just listen for words, you have to listen for meaning. Remember this idea: Listen not only to a person’s word selection but the way they say their words. So many times we hear words from people that sound like mediocre statements. You can’t let issues in life rest the first time you meet mediocrity. You will help people in the long run by caring about their situations. This does not mean be overbearing and nosey but it does mean ask follow-up questions to ensure you are not skipping over something that is important to the person.

Simply say something like, “You sound kind of down when you say fine. What’s going on?” If you notice something negative about their response, ask another question directed toward their response. The important thing to remember is your gut usually won’t serve you wrong. It doesn’t mean you’re always right, but with trial and error you will get better. So when you feel an emotion given off by another individual ask a pointed question directly toward the emotion. Make sure it is open-end not close-end. If you are unsure about the difference in the two refer to my other newsletter on Questioning Skills.

Let’s look at the other side, the positive response. After you ask someone how he or she is doing and they say fine. When you feel the emotion in their voice, body gestures, and overall mannerisms and realize they’re feeling terrific. Ask them, “You sound really energized what’s happening good in your life?” or “What’s happening today that makes you so upbeat?” Feel the person’s positive emotions and convey it when you make statements to them. You have to engage yourself into your client’s positive behavior.

Here is a review our first lesson:

• Get a notebook
• Ask gut questions
• Listen closely to the answer
• Pay close attention to people’s responses. Not only the words are important but the emotions are as well.
• Write your prospect’s responses down
• Write down the emotion you received from those words
• In private ask yourself, “What kind of questions should I ask when I hear these kinds of responses?”

Over the next couple of weeks, as you compile this information, please send me an email dennis@positiveresults.com detailing the questions you’ve asked, the response to those questions, the emotions you gathered from the person, and what questions you think to ask in the future. I promise you’ll hear back from me.

Remember

Remember, Caring About People is a way of life. Sales is a great opportunity. You have the power to make a tremendous amount of money AND to help improve people’s lives. This is done through the outstanding products you offer, and the relationships and lives you touch.

Good Luck and Good Selling. I always love to hear from people please send me an email with comments.

Let’s Make A Difference!