Make The Difference in Your Life and Others

More than fifteen years ago I sat atop my bed listening to a tape series by Zig Ziglar and with his unique voice and charismatic delivery he was saying, “You can get everything you want out of life, if you will just help enough other people get what they want.”

A few years later, I listened to a message delivered by Oprah Winfrey and she spoke of an idea called Random Acts of Kindness. Her message was clear. Do things for people without expecting anything in return. She mentions the value it has on one’s spirit and attitude. And, just the other evening I watched for the fourth time a movie called Pay It Forward. It is a story of a little boy designing an idea for his class project. The spirit of the idea is for him to do three nice things for people who couldn’t do it for themselves. Then he asks those three people to pay the favor forward to three new people and so on and so on... The boy sees this place of utopia as a perfectly realistic plan.

This time of year brings forth an array of emotions for so many. For some, this time of year is divinely spiritual, for others it is overly joyful, for some it is a time to share with family and friends, while many others experience extreme sadness for one reason or another.

***

It was a cold winter day in the small mid-western town. The winds were blowing briskly and the sun’s rays were dimmed by the cloud-covered sky. The roads were paved with slick sheets of ice while the snow fell in no particular pattern. The traffic on the main road was rather light compared to the usual weekend chaos that was brought on by area holiday shoppers. It was just about one and a half hours before the sun set and the day’s usual traffic jam as all of the families scurry to get home to sit by a cozy fire and enjoy a warm drink.

A man and his young son were traveling on Liberty Avenue. Liberty was the main thoroughfare through the small but quaint community. As the light snow turned to blizzard conditions, it became difficult to see the oncoming traffic. In fact, it took keen concentration to focus on the car just in front of the truck they drove.

Even so, the snowfall was perfect. It brought about nostalgic emotions for both the father and son. The dad’s emotions were plenty. He thought back on the times when he was a young boy and the fun he had getting ready for the holidays with his family and the nights leading up to getting all the wonderful presents. He also thought of all the joy present in his life now, being the father and creating a blissful holiday season for his family.

The emotions for the 11 year old were more energized and apparent than his father’s. After all, he and his father were on their way to the park with giant hills to go sledding!

The thought of racing down a slippery slop on a sled brought on more excitement than one boy could handle. He couldn’t stop envisioning his first trip down the hill. His internal energy released outward fidgeting more noticeably. His thoughts were running wild, “Maybe I’ll go head first…no definitely feet first so I can see all the bumps…I hope Randy shows up today so I can race him down the hill…it is going to be so fun to see dad screaming down the hill like last year. At least this year, I hope he doesn’t crash.”

Everything was going exactly as planned. They were only about 10 minutes from the slops as they approached the town bridge. The bridge stretched across the river, a permanent, interwoven fixture in the community. Without a moments notice, a few cars in front of them began to slide, one car collided with another. The moment, which only took a brief second, seemed to last for an eternity. A surge of adrenaline poured into both the father and son’s bodies. Fortunately, the dad was able to bring the big bulky truck to a stop.

At this point, there were no alternative routes to get to the slops so they were forced to wait. In no time the traffic cleared. Leaving the two collided cars sitting curbside just beyond the bridge.

One of the drivers was a little old lady probably in her early to mid 70s. The father 's truck slowly crept closer to the accident; the little old lady resting exhausted on the vehicle’s rear bumper was one of his customers.

The boy completely frustrated, and missing the fun at the slops blurted out, “Come on dad let’s just get to sledding. There is enough room to go around them!”

The father politely asked his son to quiet down and be patient. He pulled up right behind the two vehicles, exited the car, and approached the woman. It was apparent he was concerned for her safety and didn’t spare a moment to ask how she was feeling. A bit shaken she said, “Bobby, thank you so much for stopping. This is just completely horrible. The weather and roads are just, ugh…” Not a problem the boy’s father replied.

Watching his father examine the lady’s vehicle, the boy was becoming more agitated by the second. The father finally returned to the truck. All the boy could think was, “Great! We are only 20 minutes late to the slops.”

Dad opened the car and said, “I’m sorry son, but this lady needs our help. Her car is not working, and I can’t leave her sitting here in the cold. I want you to sit tight while we take her to the dealership and get her a loaner.”

The boy instantly knew what this meant. No sledding today! “Dog-gone-it” the boy thought, “all of my friends having fun and I am stuck here helping some old lady with her broken down car. Doesn’t dad know there are two perfectly good police officers here to help her through this not so tragic experience?”

The police had called a tow truck to get the car back to the father’s automobile dealership. The father returned to the truck with the little old lady at his side.

“Son I would like you to meet Mrs. Jordan.”

“Hello Mrs. Jordan”, the boy quietly replied.

Mrs. Jordan had the softest looking skin, and the distinct facial folds and wrinkles showed permanent signs of her happiness. When she smiled the wrinkles formed the most beautiful dimples.

Mrs. Jordan spoke to the boy, “Your father tells me you were heading to the park to go sledding when you stopped to help me. Sledding, that is such big fun. I remember when I was a young girl sledding down those same hills. One time, I was racing down the big hill chasing after a friend when my sled flipped over and the blade hit me right here in the forehead.” She was pointing to a small scar, which faintly appeared through the wrinkles just above her right eyebrow.

Some how, if only for an instant the boy and the little old lady connected. He peered at the scar quickly and then they both went back to laughing and sharing stories while they made the 15-minute drive back to the dealership.

A couple of minutes before arriving back at the dealership the old lady said to the boy, “Honey, I am sorry that I have caused you to miss the fun with your friends sledding today. But, without your help I don’t know what I would have done. This has been a real nice thing you’ve done for me. You know your father he is a great man. For the last 30 years he’s been helping me with one thing or another. You're lucky to have him.”

The boy became paralyzed in a moment of kindness. Even though he enjoyed the conversation and laughter, he was still a bit disheartened about missing the sledding.

His manners got the best of him, which made his father proud. The boy said, “Mrs. Jordan I am glad we were able to help you this evening. I had a lot of fun just talking with you. Plus there will always be another day for sledding, right?”

Mrs. J replied, “You bet there will be! I’ll give you my phone number and next time you go, call me - I’ll drive down and watch.”

It took another 20 minutes for the father to get Mrs. J her loaner car.

Finally, the boy and his father were back in the truck driving; however, this time they weren’t heading to the slopes, but rather heading home for night had fallen upon the day.

While on the drive the boy asked his father, “Why did you stop to help that woman, and then give her a car to use without asking for any money?”

“Son, there are times in life that people need your help. When you are in the fortunate spot to lend a helping hand, you must do so without question or hope for something in return.

Being kind isn’t a difficult task; in fact it is a lifelong behavior. As you grow older, you will find that kindness is heartwarming. You see son, we just made the difference in someone’s life today and it didn’t cost a thing except for a little time and some delayed fun.

Tomorrow, we can go sledding twice as long as we had hoped for today. And, now Mrs. Jordan is able to go home to her family and enjoy their company. Doesn’t that make you feel good?”

The boy slid back into his cozy seat and took his father’s food-for-thought into his 11-year-old brain. A short while later, a smile came to the boy’s face as he had just realized the value of the message.

Here it is over 20 years later, and that message still brings fond memories. I was that 11-year-old boy, frustrated in the moment, but inspired forever.

***

Over the years, I’ve learned that kindness is the key to life’s happiness.

Everyday, you and I are called upon in one capacity or another. It may be offering a smile to someone who needs it, holding a door open for another, stopping to listen to someone who needs to be heard, providing food to a family in need, giving the warmth of a hug to someone you just met, or even stopping on the side of the road to help someone when nobody else seems to care.

All of us are blessed this holiday season or whatever the season. We have been given the gift of life, the ability to help others, and so many other gifts. Take a moment today and in the days ahead to make the difference in someone’s life.

Work hard at being more kind and loving your fellow man, woman or child deeper than you think possible. Remember that kindness is not something we have to do; it truly is a lifelong behavior. Practice kindness regularly!